Sometimes they come back…. Sooner or later in dreams your ex or your ex will come back to show up, that’s for sure. Dreaming of the ex boyfriend / girlfriend awakens dormant emotions, moods that you had forgotten; multiple memories are reworked and returned to consciousness. The dream can happen in the immediacy of the breakup, even if it was you who terminated the relationship.
Meaning of your ex in dreams
- You still have feelings for your ex: it is an interpretation that is all too obvious, but almost never true. Almost! 🙂 There are many other meanings, as you will see as you read on. It is romantic to believe that an ex-love that appears in dreams means that he is thinking of you, or that you should go back with him … But there is no reason to jump to these conclusions, especially if you are now comfortable with another person.
- Dissatisfaction, frustration: the ex can appear in a dream in times of stress and discomfort, especially if your relationship has been turbulent. This serves as a warning to avoid falling back into the mistakes of the past, even in relation to the bonds and situations you are experiencing now.
- Regret: dreams can make you relive positive experiences and good times with your ex. This can help you understand what you could do to be happier, what you miss in life (more freedom, more passion, more carefree, being together with someone, etc).
- Aspects of your personality: your ex embodies sides of your character that you have neglected or denied (your ‘shadow’, in Jungian terms); in this sense it is a positive dream, which leads you to greater awareness, the recovery of these qualities and an enhancement of your personality.
- Your current partner: the ex in the dream can represent your partner now, perhaps because you perceive them as ‘similar’; even if they are not alike, they are connected by the role they play in your life. For example, this dream can occur when you start a new relationship with another person.
Dreaming of the ex years later
Even if you no longer think about your ex boyfriend, and even if you are very much in love with another man now, that person has left an ’emotional trace’ in your psyche that cannot be erased. Even if you no longer feel anything for him, even if you never think about it during the day, moments in life can happen in which, for one reason or another, on a dream level he recurs because he is a real ‘symbol’ of situations, emotions, phases of your life.
If you have lived a great love with your ex, your souls have really been united and therefore something of him survives in you, even after many years; the bond that has been created is indelible, and can be felt in dreams by communicating something about that person to you, even after years of not seeing them. This also explains why sometimes the dream is premonitory: you dream of your ex and soon you meet him, or receive news from him; it’s because of that special bond.
Often dreaming of the ex, always, every night
- Immediately after the breakup: even if it was you who left the ex, even if you do not regret this choice because you are convinced you have done the right thing, the separation is still a trauma, more or less great, from which you have to recover; the dream helps you to become aware of the end of the relationship.
- When the relationship ends without a reason: if you have been abandoned without receiving explanations, or in any case some important points have remained unanswered, the separation is particularly painful and there is a great tendency to mull over what happened. In this case the dream can be therapeutic and restorative.
- Your ex was violent: even in this case the dream helps you to heal from the trauma and to distance yourself from that person who hurt you.
- When you are about to start a new relationship: dreams about your ex can become very frequent because you need to free your conscience from its cumbersome ‘shadow’. Even before marriage, it can happen that you dream of your ex many times.
Dreaming of the first boyfriend or girlfriend, the first love
Dreaming of your first love, the first boy or girl you have been with is a dream that can occur periodically throughout your life. Perhaps the dream wants to bring you back to those feelings of freshness, freedom and vital momentum that are missing in your current relationship; you need a relationship without problems, without responsibilities, carefree, spontaneous, clean and romantic like the one you experienced in your adolescence.
Dreaming of an ex coming back, looking for you, apologizing to you
These are typical post-breakup dreams: the ex comes back, looks at you, writes to you, sends you a message, calls you, looks for you, apologizes, wants to get back together, make peace with you; maybe he says ‘I love you’ and asks you to marry him. They can happen either in the case in which it was you who left it, or vice versa; they show nostalgia, but at the same time they help you get used to the idea that that person is no longer part of your life.
Dreaming of an ex kissing you, marrying the ex, making love with the ex
Dreaming of an ex kissing you, hugging you, making love with the ex, marrying him, being pregnant with the ex: these are all dreams that indicate that you are somehow ‘united’ to that person, because he has helped to form the your personality.
Dreaming of an angry ex, who does not speak, who does not want you, aggressive
- Dreaming of an ex who does not speak, indifferent, cold, who does not want you, who rejects you: a dream in which the ex is cold and does not tell you why, manifests your insecurities; the separation has destabilized you.
- Dreaming of an ex who runs away, who runs away, who goes away: the ex or the ex who goes away indicates that you miss that person, but you know that you will no longer be able to be with her.
- Dreaming of an ex who shouts, insults you, treats you badly: dreaming of arguing with the ex can serve to vent the tensions accumulated in the relationship.
- Dreaming of an ex who beats you, who wants to kill you: this can be a warning from your psyche that warns you of the dangers you run if you get back with your ex; the relationship is probably too stifling.
Sad, crying, sick ex
Dreaming of an ex sad, crying, sick, asking for help, injured, sick, in the hospital – these are all dreams that manifest a sense of guilt towards him.
Dreaming of an ex dying, dead
This dream can also indicate that you feel guilty towards him, especially if he commits suicide. But dreaming that your ex is dead can also indicate that you no longer feel love for him and are ready to move on, to probably start a new story, with a person who is perhaps already in your thoughts.
Dreaming of killing ex: this may indicate that the relationship ended in a non-peaceful way; such a dream can also be a reaction to his excessive pressure and insistence.
Dreaming of your boyfriend’s ex, your girlfriend ex
Dreaming of your current partner’s ex (boyfriend, husband) can mean that you are comparing yourself to her, you feel insecure. The same thing is true when you dream of your girlfriend’s ex: low self-esteem is the basis of these dreams.